Stop Perpetuating Fear About Money

Over the last few months, many of us have been moving in and out of a fear response on a regular basis. When you turn on the news, or speak to a frightened friend, or head to a busy supermarket, that stress can trigger a fear response, which is ultimately about survival. Whether we think the corona-fear has been blown out of proportion or not, the response is totally understandable and at times needed to keep us safe. What is not needed however, is further perpetuation of fear when it comes to money. That’s what I want to write about today.

I'm doing a training at the moment about saving and investing. As part of the training, I was sent a link to listen to the latest episode of the Money Box programme on Radio 4 about how to make your money grow. So far so good right?

In the first 3 minutes of the programme, they used the word ‘Grim’ 3 times. They used the word ‘Frightening’ 3 times. Words like ‘volatile’, ‘fluctuate’, ‘stormy’ and ‘painful.’ All to describe money, on a programme that I had thought had the aim of empowering people financially.

To tell you the truth, it pissed me off.

There’s enough fear around when it comes to money. Enough of us are afraid and ashamed that it’s rarely talked about as openly as it could be. Many are already afraid to invest as it seems too scary and complicated, without it being perpetuated by programmes that are essentially there to help people. It’s the opposite of helpful, and here’s why.

Our fear response is designed for survival. It evolved to help us stick with the group, run away from a tiger or fight when attacked. Essentially, all fears boil down to a fear of physical or social ‘death.’ So when we’re in a fear response, we revert to thinking about how we can survive. In this state, it's really difficult to make decisions that line up with what you're trying to achieve, your goals and your values and who you are as a person.

These words are being used to describe the stock market, and the current situation. If you’re thinking ‘But Gail, it is scary! There’s no getting away from that!’ I get it. I get that if your entire life savings for your impending retirement coming up next month just crashed in the stock market that's going to be really uncomfortable. But I'm not sure frightening or fear are the right words to use, especially when we look at fear in terms of survival.

If you have savings, you are already in the top percentage of wealthy people in the world. It’s unlikely that savings losing value is putting you at risk of death, and if it feels like it is, there needs to be a change in the way we talk about money so that those conversations can happen away from that fear response. Frankly, you ain’t gonna learn or understand anything when your adrenaline is coursing and you think you’re about to die.

Investing comes with uncertainty, it’s built into the fabric of the system, and we need to be able to talk about how to plan for that and manage risk and what to do when your savings drop. We need to do that in a safe space, away from the judgements of ourselves or others and without talking about it as grim and painful. Who’s going to want to learn about something they're scared of?

If you’re aim is to get people talking, learning and understanding about money, we need to change the language we use. It's really important that we create an open space for people to talk about money. Ultimately the fear is in the not knowing, and when we learn more we can move into a place of knowledge and that can negate the fear that comes with it. But while we're not talking about it, while we feel shame that we don't know about it or where we don't feel it's appropriate to share with others, there's no conversations and then for some people that means there's no learning.

So part of my challenge is I want to make a safe space to talk about money. I want to make money not be the scary thing that it feels like it is when you don't know about it. Every tiny step that you make towards learning is going to help you move past that fear response, know what to expect and how to prepare for it.

Sound like something you need? Let’s talk.